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Blog Archives Page 1 



Thursday, August 23, 2007. 3:29 pm.

All day I've been expecting my shoes and then all of a sudden UPS' website updates saying the driver attempted delivery but that the building was closed.  So I called, and told a guy I wanted to complain, and he was more impressed with my being in New York than my problem.  But he said he would have the dispatcher or whoever call me back within the hour.  And that guy?  Was great.  Was completely aware of the fact that we're a library, that of course we're open, and that the driver must be an idiot and he'd send him back before we close.  Even if "before we close" is after I've left, I'd rather my shoes are here waiting in the morning than going through all this again tomorrow.


In other news, despite my taking fabulous care of myself this week, my cold has moved into my chest.  At least the cold, fall-like weather matches my feelings. 






Saturday, August 18, 2007. 7:53pm.

I'm home sick from work today (cold) and once I was done sleeping, I read.  And then found out they're raising our rent by another $200.  And then paid a bunch of bills.  And finally got Kira and Nino a wedding present.  And then decided I did in fact want to buy a crazy pair of shoes to go with my wedding dress, also by Betsey Johnson.  They're called James and after looking around for a bit, I found them on sale!  With free shipping and returns, so that's nice.  Also, they have 4 inch heels!  But also a 1" platform, so they won't be that uncomfortable.  Reviews said they were actually comfortable, so I choose to believe that.





Thursday, August 16, 2007. 6:00 pm.

Carla continues to earn her keep as my "event planner."  Thank god, because imagine me having to make that many phone calls.  Aliseo is the most helpful so far.  Apparently no one else has ever heard of anyone getting married or is shocked that we would want to book a space so far in advance (!!??!!).  Aliseo is saying that while they've never done anything like this before, they'd be happy to try to work something out.  Which is refreshing.  Carla also suggested today that why don't we rent a yacht?  Which is something I had actually been thinking about, doing a dinner cruise.  Because while it's kind of cheesy, it might also be really fun.  I also don't even want to think about what's happening to the budget.  Everyone in my family keeps telling me that they don't need me to do something so nice, but I'm not doing it for them.  I either want to do something nice, but very very small, or not really anything at all.  New York City doesn't afford much opportunity for casual and homegrown.  I would LOVE to get married in someone's backyard.  But David's the only person I know with one of those and it's made entirely out of concrete.





Wednesday, August 15. 5:04 pm.

All I want to add is that "Convivium Osteria" is very fun to say.





Tuesday, August 14. 7:19 pm.

Things are back on track in terms of hammering out details concerning location.  Frankie's is out, mostly because there were uninterested in having a conversation and more interested in imposing their version of the way things would be done.  Which is not really what I'm looking for.  Both Carla and I are fine with guidelines, but if we aren't given any we're not going to guess at what they are.  So she's calling around to places, to see their prices and availability. 




Monday, August 13. 4:12 pm.


I know it might be sort of geeky, but I went to a Wikipedia picnic this Sunday & bragged about how my wedding website was a wiki.




Friday, August 10. 1:50 pm.

I should probably post a picture, but I'm making great headway with my 1000 paper cranes project.  I'm just past 300.  Last week I bought a bunch of great paper (some of it that's almost more fabric than it is paper) at Pearl River Mart.  I have over a thousand pieces, but about 400 of those are teensy tiny papers that I won't use up.  Some of it cost as much as a dollar a paper, but the bulk of it is much much much cheaper.  Everyone who's seen the way I'm storing this growing collection has been impressed by my ingenuity (tied to a string and dropped into the space formed by bookshelf corners). 


The next step is stamp out some details and actually get this thing planned.  I know, I know, it's time.





Wednesday, July 25. 4:35 pm.

Kira and Nino got married this last weekend, and even though it wasn't the celebration they might have chosen for themselves, it was still great fun to be there.  Perhaps most impressive considering what a large wedding it was, the food was good.  A lot of that is due to Kira's curation of the meal, but the food didn't just sound good on paper, it actually tasted pretty good.


- Jenny



Sunday, July18. 12:37 pm.


I snuck to Arizona on Operation: Jenny's Mom Surprises Jenny last week.  Went fairly grandly.  Wish should would stop falling down!





Tuesday, July 17. 12:59 pm.

Back from Arizona, I toppled down the stairs yesterday while attempting to take my dress for Kira's wedding to be pressed.  I'm pretty bruised and cut up, and was worried for a bit that I might have fractured my arm.  Kira said that she'd been worried about breaking her arm, so I figure I did my maid of honor duty and took one for the team.  And then today I've been working on my toast for her.  I'm trying to find the right balance between making it mostly about her, since Justin's speech will mostly be about Nino, and at least acknowleding the fact that I'm close to them both.

So not only now am I taller and tanner than Kira, I will probably have to wear a big ol' bandage on my arm.  Classy.





Wednesday, July 4, 11:37 am.

I've decided to ensure the future health of our marriage by folding 1000 paper cranes.  The wish this will entitle me to will be backed by powerful magics.  So far i've folded 101, these are the most recent 51 of those. 


Also, I finally figured out how to use html on this wiki, it's hidden under "insert plugin" with lots of other fun stuff.  So that makes posting pictures a lot easier, just use your own (or flickr's) bandwidth.


- Jenny



Monday, July 2, 3:36 pm.

For reference and for anyone who's interested, these are some websites and blogs I've been reading.


Offbeat Bride The website promoting the book I'd previously adored.  Photos of "offbeat" weddings, links to other interesting wedding stuff, and advice.

Brooklyn Bride The blog of an interior designer who's getting married with a lot of well-designed products and color inspiration.

Indiebride This site's forums are pretty well-known and heavily used, but aren't particularly "indie." The etiquette section is sometimes fun.  There's a blog, that's mostly about motherhood now.  But no part of the site has RSS feeds, so I only look at it when I think of it.






Wednesday, June 27, 11:30 am.

I know I've got time, but if anyone has tips on how I can get my thighs into sick shape before the wedding, let me know.  I've considered working with one of the personal trainers at our gym, but it seems like the only options are cocky guys or an overweight lady.  And maybe you don't have to be in good shape yourself to know how to tell other people to work out, but it doesn't inspire confidence.  Why am I so worried about this?  Well, not worried exactly, but the one dress I bought is really really short and I want to make the best of it.


- Jenny



Tuesday, June 19. 5:02 pm.

Kira's bachelorette party weekend up at her aunt and uncle's vacation home is now over and I certainly had a good time.  But I was never worried.  Kira's about as good at mixing groups of friends as I am, but I think it went okay.  Everyone was a bit alpha, which was funny because Candace early on in the weekend admitted she likes to be alpha.  Also funny, because I think girls are much more subtle about it than boys, but they still do it.  I got very tan, I got a massage, I didn't actually get that much sleep, and I ate a lot of really good food.  It was super relaxing and mostly low-key.  The craziest thing that happened was that Candace and I went skinny dipping late on Saturday night, which wasn't so crazy because of the lack of bathing suits (we were all women after all) but because the water was pretty cold.  If I feel at all bad that I didn't plan the whole thing, and that there wasn't anything tacky about it, it's overridden by the fact that I had a really good time and wouldn't have changed anything.





Sunday, June 17. 8:20 pm.


Jenny is about to get home from Kira's bachelorette party weekend, & I'm excited.  I went kayaking but mostly it would have been better if she came.



Thursday, June 14. 3:12 pm.

I'm massively conflicted about this.  I guess this is the flip side of the freedom afforded by receiving no-strings-attached gifts.


- Jenny



Friday, June 8. 7:19 pm.

The more I think about it, the more I like this new plan of mine.  Party hats and corsages for everyone! 





Thursday, June 7. 12:26 pm.

Alright, the parade is a pretty good idea.  I just would like to have enough of a "to-do" to get people to come visit, right?






Wednesday, June 6. 10:51 am.

Not to freak anyone out yet, if anyone would care that much, but I've sort of been reconsidering the whole wedding thing.  Not the marriage, just the expensive party part.  Because even taking 35 people out to a nice dinner is very expensive.  Mostly, the $50,000 in student loans that James and I have is really freaking me out.  And the ones I've taken out for library school don't even have a good interest rate.  So yeah, I've been reconsidering.  I'd still like to celebrate, and even in a way that would enticing enough for some people to come from out of town.  Even if it means stuffing everyone into our apartment for a pot luck.  Like, can't we get married at city hall (it's virtually across the street from where I work and I always see people leaving in wedding dresses) and then have a parade across the bridge and a party at my house?  We'll see.





Sunday, June 3. 11:09 pm.


I uploaded some pictures of the engagement party.  I haven't added captions, so anyone who wants to help with that can do so.  Also, I realized that I mostly put up pictures of people that I'm friends with.  Or really, people who my friends are friends with.  Because the people I knew took pictures of people they knew.  So James, if you want to go back and add pictures with Bernie and Mike, you might want to do that.  It wasn't on purpose that I excluded them, there just weren't as many pictures of them.  Danielle however, there are lots of pictures of Danielle.




Tuesday, May 29. 4:22 pm.

I would like to make a record of the fact that James was the first to have a wedding anxiety dream.  He showed up to the ceremony without having purchased himself a wedding band or having written his vows.  He was happy(?) to find me equally as unprepared.





Tuesday, May 29. 2:53 am.

I think Jenny has captured the essence of the engagement party: havok, but I think everybody had themselves a good time.  At this point everyone is accounted for with no casualties, so lets count that victory.  We know, we know that a limited open bar is our bane!  The pictures have been pretty darn funny; the shirt-removal I think happened to start posing with the pin-ups decorating the place?  Anyhow, I guess I'll hold off on posting pictures till there is a more comprehensive roll-call.  As it stands there arn't even any of the two of us!  Here is one of me & Danielle with Jenny in the background at least, as a teaser.







Tuesday, May 29. 10:21 am.

Pictures are beginning to trickle in from Sunday night's engagement party.  It looks like we had fun!  James and I got tricked again by an open bar.  The danger isn't in having a few hours of possibly unlimited drinks, it's when there is an appearance of short supply.  Like, the bartender was having a hard time keeping up with people's drink orders so you would just grab a drink when you saw one, and then people started ordering five or six drinks at a time and then passing them out and you start thinking you only have a half hour left, you better get a few more drinks in.  And that's clearly a bad idea.  Add to that a couple of rounds of shots for the whole group, and it's no wonder the end of the evening is as hazy as it was.  I think everyone got their money's worth, especially since we were drinking expensive alcohol and complicated drinks.  Apparently David even had a signature drink crafted for him?  The eponymous Davidtini.  Carla did an amazing job being hostess, from the flowers to the food, to talking to everyone and making them feel comfortable.  It was fun to have Kira and Carla interact, it's been I don't even know how long since they've seen each other, maybe college.


And like I said, there'll be pictures as soon as I get them all.




Saturday, May 26. 10:25 pm.

Just got back home from helping Kira a bit more with the invitations.  Her stamps hadn't arrived yet, so they couldn't be totally finished, but there's not much left.  Then we walked through the park and our old neighborhood to go to The Farm on Adderley.  It was a nice dinner, but the place is definitely out of the running.  The space isn't right, and neither is the neighborhood.  Then we walked all the way back home.  I think I walked six or seven miles today!  I'm home right now because I want tonight to be an early night so that I'm well rested for the party tomorrow.  I'm disappointed that so many people won't be able to come, for both reasonable and totally stupid reasons, but that's life and I still think it's going to be great.  Knowing how overboard Carla goes just having a few people over for drinks, I'm sure it's going to be so much fun.  And if at this late date anyone is reading this and wondering if they can still come even if they haven't RSVP'd, or if they can bring a friend or a date or whatever, yes, that's fine.  The more the merrier.  I'm getting married in 364 days!  





Monday, May 21. 12:54 pm.

In return for a hard day's work putting together Kira's wedding invitations, her and Nino took me and Donna out to brunch at Rosewater.  I had grits with truffle oil, cheese, spinach and poached eggs.  And three drinks!  Not like, 3 alcoholic drinks.  3 different drinks at the same time.  Then we spent the day cutting and folding, and the cutting board I recently bought came in very handy.  We didn't get enough done, but we got a lot done.  Kira's printer just couldn't keep up.  I might go back over there on Saturday to help her stuff envelopes.  We had thought we might take a long walk down to The Farm on Adderley to check it out for my wedding, but it was getting late and didn't seem quite warm enough to walk that far.  So instead we went to Aliseo, which is another place in the running, and it might be a little small, but I liked it.  It's also Italian, but different than the food at Frankies.  I would compare Frankies to Otto, and Aliseo to Al di la.  Everyone there seemed to know everyone else, and the waiter and waitress (maybe the owner?) hugged and kissed everyone as they came in.  One couple who was there was talking about how they'd had them do their wedding.  I don't know if they did it at the restaurant or just had them cater it.  They have a garden, which we didn't see, but were told is great.  So we'll see.


And while I spent yesterday helping Kira with stuff for her wedding, it seems like Carla spent the day getting stuff ready for the engagement party.  She's probably going overboard, but she knows how important this is to me and it means a lot that she's characteristically going to such lengths to throw a great party.





Sunday, May 20. 11:24 am.

I was thinking that I should wear my sword to the wedding: what do you think?




Monday, May 14. 6:32 pm.

I just heard from my mom that my cousins (all 2 of them) are planning on coming.  Which is exciting.  I'd hoped they'd be able to make it, but hadn't expected it.  I almost wish that Brett and Jenny could bring their kids, though I'm sure they'll have a lot more fun on their own (think of the cute pictures) and Lamanda, Matthew's girlfriend has offered to do my makeup.  She does makeup, and I sort of wanted to hire someone to do it, but sort of didn't, so this seems like a nice compromise.  Someone people have hired, but I am not hiring. 




 Monday, May 14. 2:44 pm.

Now it is getting to the point where wrangling people for the engagement party is an issue.  Mostly I'm concerned that saying "mail Carla forty bucks" sounds kind of mercenary, but come on.  We all know that its easy-peasy to lay down plenty more than forty dollars on an evening; this way everything is taken care of.  Also, you know, slacker lazy people.  I'm kind of a little worried, since I know a big parcel of Jenny's folks flaked on her.  I mean, it should all work out, but if you're reading this & you havn't mailed your check, consider yourself nagged.


-Mr. & Mrs. Mordicai Burke.


Monday, May 14. 1:42 pm.

So while I don't plan on changing my name, I can't imagine being offended by ever being called Mrs. Burke or having things addressed to me that way.  But it's beyond weird that it is still considered acceptable in some circles to call a couple Mr. and Mrs. James Burke.  That, I'm not okay with.  So no, I won't be walking into my reception with an anouncement to that effect.




Monday, May 14. 10:32 pm.

Well, I'm sick.  So no scouting out locations yesterday.  I had hoped it was allergies, but it seems more like a cold.  At least with a cold, it will be gone in a few days.  But I really would like to get the location settled.  I can't believe I bought a dress already.  Don't get me wrong, I feel good about it (and 14-year-old me is excited it's Betsey Johnson).  And Meryl was great to go shopping with and really reassuring about the fact that I was making the right decision.  And then Carla being excited about it was great, I know she might have tried to lie if she hadn't liked it, but I think I would have been able to tell.  Which isn't a judgement on Carla's ability to lie, just that I think a lot of times she lies poorly on purpose so that you still get her meaning, but she gets out of saying something rude.  But screaming, and telling me she wanted to throw up, is a good sign.  Hopefully I'll feel better by tomorrow night when we're supposed to hang out.  And soon, I'll be helping Kira make the invitations to her wedding.  Whenever our schedules match up.  I'm excited, because even though they'll be homemade, I think they'll still be pretty formal and have multiple components.  So I get to have that experience.  I think all the pomp is fun, as long as it doesn't have to be my pomp. 





Sunday, May 13. 11:47 pm.

I certainly didn't mean to buy a dress yesterday, I thought I would be able to drag it out a bit more.  But I guess that's the way stuff happens.  It's the way I found my engagement ring, so why not?  And knowing what the dress looks like will make other decisions easier.  I haven't confirmed with Kira but we had talked about walking to the Farm on Adderley to check it out as a venue.  So I look forward to that.





Saturday, May 12. 7:05 pm. 

Well, I don't know that I would have posted those pictures, but there they are.  Also, and maybe I'm glad for it, they don't totally accurately depict the dress.  Also, I don't think anyone could pull it off for prom.  They had it in a couple of different colors that would work, but the white is much whiter than it looks in the picture. 


I had plans with Meryl to meet up at Bloomingdales to try to see if they had the red dress that I liked.  When I got out of the train, she said she was at Betsey Johnson and I should meet her there.  She later admitted she engineered the whole thing to get me into the store, because she thought I would find something awesome there.  Which I did, but all their sizes were too small.  But they said their SoHo store carries bigger sizes and that they had a 6 in the dress I tried on almost as a joke, but really loved.  We went to Bloomingdales, and no surprise we couldn't find the dress.  But we did find another dress, I may or may not keep it, that I can change into during dinner at the wedding because there's just no way to sit down in the dress pictured below.  Or to eat dinner.  It's got boning that isn't uncomfortable but isn't roomy.  We hopped onto a downtown six train and I finally got to try the dress on in my size and while it's not what I expected to end up in, I think it's probably the most stunning dress I could find.  One of my wishes was to find a dress that almost no one else could pull off.  Being skinny is pretty nice in everyday life, and I'm pretty lucky that stuff looks good on me, but I wanted something difficult.  And I think a gigantic, bulb-shaped dress qualifies.  But everyone in the store kept telling me how amazing it looked and that I had to buy it.  And I don't think I'm exagerrating by saying everyone.  I think even Meryl can attest to the fact that the dress stopped people in their tracks.  Once it got zipped up.  Which was a feat.  Once zipped, it fits perfectly and not at all too tightly.  But the zipping was tough.  Hopefully easier when I don't have a full bladder.


I wasn't entirely sure if I should get it, so I put it on hold thinking that I would think about it overnight and come back on Sunday.  But over the course of our late lunch, I became more convinced it was the right dress, so we went back to get it.  And one of my reservations about it was fixed!  They found another size six other than the one I'd tried on which had some very minor catches in the fabric that no one but me would ever see, but the dress I bought has no such catches and is instead perfect.  My favorite thing about it is its sillouhette from the side.  I continue to be really happy with it.  And James isn't right that I am so worried about the cost of it, for a wedding dress it's ridiculously cheap.  I guess I'm just surprised by how much of a wedding dress it is, how much DRESS it is.  But it's still not full-length, which is just not what I'm going for.  I'm excited.





Saturday, May 12. 4:54 pm.

Jenny's been calling me for the last couple of hours agonizing over whether or not to get a dress.  Or really, asking for permission.  Or well, convincing herself that she can go ahead & get it.  I'd been giving her the "I can't see it but I trust your taste" angle, but she called me up & made me find it online so I could give her the full go-ahead.  She has my full endorsement & I think she may end up getting it.  She was worried about the price, but I feel like a couple of hundred dollars is worth achieving the perfect status of the evening, right?  Even better, I think it is a prom dress.  Also, in the matter of rings: I think in order to get my permission to get the flat black tungsten ring, Jenny needs to be able to find a silver band with black accents.  I want her to be happy, but, right, I also want to get things perfect for me.  So keep your eyes open!  Here are a few pictures of the dress:






Saturday, May 12. 10:49 am.

What is the verdict on Frankie's 457 Court Street Spuntino? Well, my vote is only a voice in the wilderness on this one, I suspect, but I liked it just fine. I don't mean to imply that Jenny didn't like it; I think she probably did. Everyone seemed very impressed with the outdoor area, & it was very large. They had a separate little enclave back there too. The feeling I got from the girls was that a lot of it depended on the price. If it was reasonable to rent it, it would be a good location, that sort of thing.  The food would be served family style, which I think is also part of the allure.





Friday, May 10. 4:48 pm.

It seems like Carla is having problems getting people to RSVP to our party.  Which is lame.  Get with it people!  If you're planning on coming, but just haven't gotten around to sending her your check, stop what you're doing and do it right now.  If you don't come, you better have a really good excuse, because I seem like I'm all sorts of laid back about stuff like this and I've always made attendance at my birthday parties totally optional, but I am not playing this time.  Come!


 Thursday, May 10. 5:30 pm.

One of the things that is interesting about us getting married is figuring out what cultural assumptions we're going to buy into, & which we arn't; not to mention that this is an ongoing, organic proceedure, making it hard to peg things down.  Are we going to have rings?  Yes.  Are we going to be in a church?  No.  White wedding dress?  Yes!  No!  Open bar?  Yes!  It is hard to predict, because Jenny's internal mythology is much less on her sleeve than mine, but it is there.  I do think that a black Mordicai & a red Jenny would fit the (completely unofficial) colour scheme we've been cooking up.


- mordicai.




Thursday, May 10. 5:22 pm.

So, I kind of want to wear this dress.  Even though I think I kind of yelled at James when he suggested I could wear a red dress.  It doesn't come in any other color, but I think maybe I don't care.  Nevermind.  I guess I won't get the chance to look whorish at my wedding.



sad, dead link.





Thursday, May 10th. 12:14 pm.

Tomorrow night Kira, Nino, James and I are going to have dinner at Frankie's Spuntino to see what James and I think of it.  Also, last night using the images James microsoft painted me, I made a mock up of the Save-the-date card.  I think it'll be cute, and I'm so ready to send them out, I just need to figure out where it's going to be and to book a place!  No big deal!  And if it's as nice this weekend as I've heard it will be, Kira and I will probably walk over to the Farm on Adderley on Sunday.  It's over near me and Kira's old apartment, which might be fun.  In any case, it'll be a nice walk through the park. 



 Wednesday, May 9th. 5:33 pm.

So I think what I want is a tungsten wedding ring.







 Wednesday, May 9th. 11:44 am.

Arg, the computer ate my entry.  I was mentioning that I've sort of uncovered a head-space to think about my wedding band in, springing out of helping Peter geek out on my page.  I won't go into how the sphere of annihilation makes my toes curl, but it sure does.  I didn't do too well at telling Jenny that I'd started thinking about ring-things, though; hit her in a crabapple mood & we sort of tussled.  Not a big to-do; after unwinding at the gym it was water under the bridge.  Do they make bands of titanium?  It seems like they would, & that would check off a couple of faces on the totem pole.  Anyhow, just sort of a dawning realization, which is kind of welcome, because I'm not really a jewelry guy, though I have been in the past.





Tuesday, May 8, 2007. 4:12 pm.

The book that I'm reading at the moment, How to Have the Wedding You Want, is actually another fairly good book, mostly just because it reinforces the idea that whatever you want is reasonable as long as it makes you happy and doesn't cause too much strife.  But the cover.  The cover is terrible.  It's got a silly drawing of a lady in an old-fashioned dress (and converse) with a dog pulling on her hem.  I hate that even something that is a thoughtful and well-written book is still infantilizing. 



Monday, May 7, 2007. 9:47 pm.

So I'm sitting here at the desk with a 6-foot long nodachi on my lap updating about the tiny little robots I'm going to draw.  Should I be charmed that Jenny lumps my joke-drawings in with the therapy art of schizophrenics & elephants?  Because I am!  Probably not as charmed as I am every time I hear that story about her dressing up as the girl with the green satin ribbon, alias the girl I had a crush on at age six.  Can I make her wear a green ribbon around her neck as part of the wedding dress?  Anyhow, Jenny called today as an official team holiday, which means no gym!




Monday, May 7, 2007.  9:19 pm.

So I'm officially done with school for the summer.  Yay.  Today, walking from work to class, I stopped in at the Kate's Paperie that's moving to a new location and bought 35 of the cards that I'm going to print out as STD cards.  I probably saved about $1 doing this.  But whatever, it's fun to even pretend like you're being thrifty.  The plan I just came up with is to make James, in his very "outsider artist with some crayola markers" style of drawing things, draw me a little picture that will be the bottom border.  Partially I want this because I'm scared I'm going to start accidentally getting tasteful about this.  And while that's sort of me, it's not really me.  Also, part of this is that I have decided these cards will not fit into my "color scheme" (also to thwart any tastefullness desires I might secretly harbor).  Which is mostly, probably, green and ivory, with some gold accents.  I have always been obsessed with green ribbons, mostly since I heard the story when I was little about the girl who kept her head on with a green satin ribbon (I dressed up as her one year for Halloween) and I definitely want to have some at my wedding.  Which, call me sentimental, I also sort of like because my Mom's wedding dress had green ribbon accents.  And how cute is that? 


(From Mom:  Aww.  I didn't know you even remembered that my dress had the dark green ribbon accent.  I am touched that you would consider that the beginning of some kind of tradition.  Well, okay, there's that thing about the girl whose head falls off...)


Monday, May 7, 2007. 2:39 pm.

Is it weird to be so excited about something I never thought about before or imagined I would ever care about?  I guess because even though I don't intend on getting caught up in trying to have a "perfect" wedding, I do sort of want my dream wedding.  Which mostly just entails people having fun, my dream is that people, most especially me, have fun at my wedding.  Without monogramming things, or putting dye in the toilets to match my color scheme (no kidding, that's a thing people do), I want this thing to be a reflection of who James and I are, both as a couple and individually.  I want to capture the feeling of a fun, intimate dinner with friends.  The kind where you try and share lots of things, and you probably drink too much wine but you never get drunk because you've also been eating too much.  I should remember to get a loose-fitting dress.


And it's funny, because I wouldn't say I'm stressed out, but I am on an emotional rollercoaster.  My reactions to things (usually I manage to keep it internal) manage to be wildly innapropriate, in both directions.  I think this is why I usually try to keep myself on a much evener keel, I'm a really poor sport and I don't handle disappointment well.  I'm not sure what could really go wrong with these plans, because I'm not that wedded to any one aspect of them.  But I am sure I will find plenty to get upset about.


(From Mom:  I am impressed with your self awareness, and I did have to laugh at these thoughts.  I am happy you are excited about it--that keeps me motivated.  If you start feeling "disappointed" or down about something, just look at that picture of you as a baby laughing and remember what a happy soul is buried there somewhere.)


Saturday, May 5, 2007. 12:05 am.

Tonight, with the unwitting help of my Mom, I discovered how to revert edits.  I am very happy that wiki's include that feature.  Also, maybe I should be happier but I'm tired, I am virtually done with my coursework for the semester.  All I have left is to wake up tomorrow and look over my assignment, add citations, and then turn it in.  And all I have left to do for my YA bibliography is to print out enough copies for everyone in my class.  Which is four other people counting the professor.  So I'm going to go to bed.  And hope that James is enjoying Spider-Man 3, and that my parents don't put up any too too embarrassing pictures of me from my childhood.





Friday, May 4, 2007. 12:29 pm.

With work and school, I've been pretty busy, but for the first time in awhile I don't have a thousand YA books that I need to read, and so my subway time is finally my own again.  But I'm not really sure what to do with it.  So after some deliberation and consultation with James yesterday, I decided that I would in fact read The Offbeat Bride on the subway.  It seemed scarily conspicuous, but I was looking forward to reading it and didn't have time for it either at home or at work.  Yesterday, no one took too much notice.  But today, on my way into the city, the girl sitting next to me couldn't have been more up in my business.  What with the reading over my shoulder and ducking down underneath the book to try to look at my ring.  Which she couldn't see, but she got super excited once I started getting ready to get off the train and so she finally got a look at it.  I should have said something, because she was taking her noticing of me way too far and it was distracting, but I don't think she was the sort of person who would be judging me, either for being an "offbeat bride" or for reading a silly book on the subway (reading the A-List, Gossip Girls, and other fluffy YA books has really helped inure me to caring about what other subway riders see me reading).


But man, are people's reactions to my ring telling.  On the one hand, you have people like Danielle, who get so excited about it they practially want to steal it, and on the other are people who just. don't. get it.  If all I'd ever wanted my entire life was an overpriced sparkly ring, I would have gotten one. Besides, mine sparkles and reflects the light a ton.




Thusday, May 3, 2007. 10:44 pm.

I am trying to claim control of the seating arrangements, but apparantly a wedding isn't supposed to be "volatile"?  ANYHOW the plan Jenny came up with is gold.




Thursday, May 3, 2007. 2:30 pm.


I had James buy me the book Offbeat Bride by Ariel Meadow Stallings, and I am loving it. I've checked out a few other books from the library, and while some have some helpful tips, this is better at putting me in the right frame of mind. I'm not so much interested in a "budget" wedding. I don't want to have frilly white things I made myself in an approximation of a more lavish wedding. I really just want to do things my way, with things that are meaningful to James and I. If I wasn't so stressed out about the final projects I have due in the next few days, and the work snafus that are making me a tiny bit nuts, I would be letting myself get really really excited right now.


In less exciting news, the invite for the engagement party went out with the incorrect date on it. Nice, Jenny. But I am really excited about the party, and couldn't be more grateful to Carla for all the work and thought she's putting into this.




Saturday, April 21, 2007. 12:08 pm.

Putting together the guest list, I'm sad about how friend-heavy it is. Most of my relatives, for various reasons, probably won't be able to come. Having a wedding in New York City is a really good way to (unwittingly) scare adults away. 


Tonight, after I spend my whole afternoon in my archives class, I'm meeting up with Carla. I haven't seen her since she got back from her Ohio trip, haven't seen her since Easter. I'm really excited to get to tell her about everything, and start planning stuff. And to let her know that she is basically going to be planning this thing for me.




Tuesday, April 17, 2007. 8:10 am.

i was looking online at the Tiffany's website at the ring Jenny picked out for her engagement ring, & i noticed that the size available jumped from 4½ to like a 9, while jenny's dainty little claws are a size 6. which, probably for the best, nixed just ordering it online. see, i often like to avoid commerce! anyhow, i got on the blower pronto, to find out just what hacking had to be done to set things right. i sort of figured they'd either tell me how easy resizing is (which, i don't understand resizing rings at all. do they cut them? use heat & stretch them? i don't know!) or, as was the case, have one at another location. the customer service gynoid was very nice & directed me to the manhattan tiffany's; there i went from a personal buyer (dismayed when i told him i only wanted to hold it; at this time i wasn't sure if i should pick it up on my own or wait for jenny to come with me to give the final okay) toto "stacey." everyone advised me to go pick it up immediately, so i left work & boarded the train. i didn't much like going to tifffany's with my wet umbrella! the power dynamics of purchases befuddle me, but it was good to get the experience points (if i ever decide to put ranks in appraise). the worst part was walking up to a worker bee & being all-- "um, they told me to ask for...stacey?" & have them stare at me confused until finally realizing "oh! thats silver. you have to go to the third floor." so there is a life lesson; check which floor of tiffany's, because that is a real important indicator. anyhow, i'm sure it wasn't a big commission purchase for stacey, but she seemed professional enough. maybe i'll remember you, stacey! you're my go-to girl at tiffany's. on the way home, there was a broken train, so the f went on the a line to jay street.




Monday, April 16, 2007. 10:32 pm.

i got my ring and it is my favorite! i just want to keep looking at it. it is a very strange thing to suddenly find oneself wearing a ring on that finger. i love it.





Sunday, April 15, 2007. 5:11 p.

Imma gonna get hitched.

Anyone who's ever talked to me about it knows I was never particularly interested in getting married, and more recently had grown less interested. Until suddenly I decided I was. My first inclination was to bring it up with James, but then realizing that his birthday was coming, I figured it might be romantic to pop the question at dinner on his birthday. And since I was fairly certain he would accept, there was little risk involved.  Almost no one knew about this beforehand. Sarah gets points for being the most excited for me, but by the time I told her I was more certain about it and probably more excited myself.


I wanted to take James to the Blue Ribbon Sushi here in Brooklyn. Getting sushi is an unofficial birthday and special occasion tradition, and neither of us had been there before and I figured this was the perfect opportunity to blow a bunch of money on a memorable meal. Which was risky, just because James doesn't value expensive dining experiences. But luckily, he really valued this one and kept saying stuff like, "This is definitely worth the money" and oohing and ahhing over everything. It was so much fun to watch him enjoying himself and it helped keep my courage up.


After our dinner, I had the waitress bring out a small bottle of champagne. James asked if I wanted to make a toast and when I said yes, I think he thought I was joking because he went to take a sip, so I reasserted, "I do!" To which he jokingly responded with something about was I agreeing to marry him, so that I had to be like, "No, but I was gonna ask you to marry me." I think at first it didn't sink in, and he said OK. But then I could tell by look on his face that he realized what was going on. And it was so exciting! We were both so excited and really dorky about it. It was such fun.




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